Dear God,
It happened again today.
Despite my best intentions...I blew it, God.
Despite my best intentions...I blew it, God.
What would you say to God if you could reveal the deepest parts of your heart in a letter? What would you confess? What help would you ask for?
Dear God,
It happened again today. Despite my best intentions...I blew it, God.
I woke up early and the day started off with such promise! In my heart I had the best intentions: I would let You prioritize and lead my day.
But as our day got going, my toddler pushed and pushed my heart. She took toys from her baby sister, wouldn't stay seated at the dinning table, and she even locked me out of the car as I was putting her in her car seat. Oh God, how I love her dearly. But some days? If I am honest? She depletes my patience supply before we even get to 9:00!
As the day moved on a less than helpful manager at the bank bumped into my happy. She wouldn't notarize a document I really needed completed because it was in the wrong format. I left frustrated. It was a wasted trip with the kids in tow.
This was followed by that mean shopper at the grocery store who pulled into my spot...a spot clearly marked for moms with kids. My heart simmered as she trotted into the store alone.
By nap time I was exhausted physically and emotionally. The last little bit of patience I had melted in a fit of anger when my toddler woke her sister up for the third time. I yelled. I threatened. I slammed her door.
It was ugly, God.
My unglued moment.
A moment where the least desirable parts of my heart showed. To my most precious little one.
As my baby cried on the other side of the door I breathed, breathed, breathed. Willing myself to calm down. Asking you for help.
But the damaged was done.
I was not a great mom today.
I did not model how to be patient. How to love each other. How to talk softly and respectfully.
Oh God. I trudge heavy-hearted toward dinnertime now. My energy is gone and I just feel defeated. I pray tomorrow I'll "get it right." I pray for a heart like Jesus'. A heart full of love, patience and understanding despite the world that can throw some crazy at us some times.
And I pray for your forgiveness. Thank you for loving me anyway, God. No matter how I disappoint or fall short of glorifying You, I know there is always hope for me in your unending love and patience for my life.
In Jesus' Name I Pray,
Michelle
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Today I wrote my letter to God as part of Faith Barista's Thursday Faith Jam. Head over to her site for more inspiration, encouragement and letters to God. You'll be hooked!
If you are like me, you need help for the days when someone gets "all up in your happy." You know. Those unglued days. I am so excited to share that my favorite Christian author, Lysa TerKeurst has a brand new book out on this very subject!
God gave us emotions to experience life, not destroy it! Lysa TerKeurst admits that she, like most women, has had experiences where others bump into her happy and she comes emotionally unglued. We stuff, we explode, or we react somewhere in between. What do we do with these raw emotions? Is it really possible to make emotions work for us instead of against us? Yes, and in her usual inspiring and practical way, Lysa will show you how.
Filled with gut-honest personal examples and biblical teaching, Unglued will equip you to:
- Know with confidence how to resolve conflict in your important relationships.
- Find peace in your most difficult relationships as you learn to be honest but kind when offended.
- Identify what type of reactor you are and how to significantly improve your communication.
- Respond with no regrets by managing your tendencies to stuff, explode, or react somewhere in between.
- Gain a deep sense of calm by responding to situations out of your control without acting out of control.
FREE UNGLUED WEBCAST!!!!!!!!!
Lysa has invited some amazing bloggers, writers and women to be part of her Unglued Webcast TONIGHT (Thursday, August 23rd). It airs LIVE from 8-9pm EST.
Go to www.lysaterkeurst.com to view it... if it doesn't show up right away be sure to refresh your browser. There will be a replay the next day in case you miss it or want to share it. I hope y'all will tune in for that!!!!
Now tell me, what would You say in a letter to God? Or how do you calm down when life becomes Unglued?
Blessings, Michelle
We all have days like that! (Be sure to visit Lisa Notes to read her Letter to God.) Praying that He will fill you with grace for today.
ReplyDeleteThank you so much, Melissa! I am finally catching up on some reading this afternoon and so look forward to reading Lisa's and other submissions. What a wonderful source of inspiration!
DeletePray you are having a great weekend!
Michelle
Thanks for your honesty, Michelle!! That's what my prayer letters to God look like every day!! Thankfully we serve a God who understands, still loves and forgives us when we seek Him!! Love your heart...it's in the right place even when tempers flare! Love you girl!!
ReplyDeleteThank God for His unending grace! And for awesome girlfriends like you who lift me up in prayer everyday. Love your sweet self!
DeleteMichelle
Great letter. It sounds like it's a I-need-chocolate kind of day.
ReplyDelete*LOL* Ha! I tell you everrrrrrrrry day this summer has seemed like an I-need-chocolate day! Um hmm. But full of blessings too. SO excited fall and all the excitement and possibilities it holds is rolling into the south with great speed!
DeletePray you are having a blessed day where you are!
Michelle
Oh, how I remember these types of days! The hard days are different for me now - my kids are 9, 7, 5 and 4. Know "this, too, shall pass" and try to find the moments of the day you CAN savor!
ReplyDeleteWow! Four children! How do you do it? MOst of the time when I take my little ones anywhere I am drenched by the time we get there! *LOL* What a great reminder to treasure the small moments, they grow up too fast! I've seen many a mom this week shedding tears as they send their little ones off to school for the first time.
DeleteBig hugs and have a blessed weekend,
Michelle
Honesty is so freeing! I know it sucks when we feel like we've really messed up, but on the other hand it is also good for our souls to remember that we need forgiveness, we are not our own saviour.
ReplyDeleteAnd boy - looking after toddlers requires a very specific type of patience - as the mother of one, I can definitely empathise!
Thanks so much for the encouragement, Tanya! I definitely feel humbled on these days. Today in church we talked about 1 Corinthians 13:4-7
DeleteEnglish Standard Version (ESV)
Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.
Wow. Total conviction there. I am trying to take deep breaths and remember to love like Jesus...even before naptime! *LOL*
Thank you so much for stopping by and commenting. I wanna know more about you. How old is your little one? Tried going to your site but I think Jeff's troubles at goinswriter are affecting you too...says there is a virus on your site. Lots of people have been affected. Hopefully it will be cleared up tomorrow!
Blessings, Michelle
I think we have to make ourselves aware of our shortcomings to be forced to turn to Him. Great post.
ReplyDeleteThank you so much, Bettyl!
DeleteSo true! When we are looking down it is the best, most humbling time to look up to Him, to rely on Him. Loved visiting your blog and reading your beautiful story! Your pics of NZ are so beautiful! What part are you in? My husband and I visited the north island and loved Rotarua (sp?). We've always dreamed of going back to the south island one day. The people are so lovely there!
ReplyDeleteBlessings and an All Blacks Fan!
Michelle
I love your letter and in many ways that could be me writing it. Although I have no young ones anymore. My teen still manages to push my buttons and I have to work to have patience and many times I fail.
ReplyDeleteOh gosh...I think some days about Teagan being a teenager. Sometimes it feels like she is "there" now, God love her! Thanks for visiting. I so love your blog!
DeleteThank you! This is exactly what I needed to read this morning. (I LOVE how God does that!) My heart was so crushed this morning. I lost it. I lost my peace and patience over tying my 5 year olds shoe. Can it be more trivial? He wasn't "cooperating" the way I thought he should be. I didn't even realize I had raised my voice. His face, suddenly tucked into his shirt collar to hide his tears, said it all. He couldn't understand why I had yelled at him when he was just trying to help. I crumbled before God. Asking both He and my son to forgive me. After my little guy was on the bus and off to school, I broke down and cried. Thank you for the precious reminder that every time I fall short, He is there still loving me and forgiving me. Such honest encouragment to me today!
ReplyDeleteOh Cindy, reading this later...and now it is YOU who have encouraged me all over again. It's so easy to forget how tender our little babies hearts are! Bless you for being so sweet and open, connecting with a mama who needed those words today.
ReplyDeleteHugs, Michelle
This was a touching post. I have had those days when I dropped into bed feeling like an utter failure as a mom. God is so faithful and good!! Three of my children just came back from a missions trip. When we fail; God is there turning those moments into something beautiful for Him.
ReplyDeleteThanks again for linking up another wonderful post over at Haven of Rest. I will be back this Wednesday as life settles down to normal (whatever that may be) so I hope to find you linking up again :-)