Thursday, April 19, 2012

When God Says "No"

The other day, I saw the most beautiful dragonfly buzzing around our front door.  Dragonflies.  I love them. In Japan, they are called tombo and serve as a symbol of good luck. 



This vision of a tombo in my front yard brought back memories.  As a college student, I longed to travel.  And my heart has always been fascinated by France.  The people.  The food.  The gorgeous language and scenery. I wanted to study there. But despite my greatest efforts, I could never pull the funds together.  I was frustrated and discouraged. 

For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.

Jeremiah 29:11 (NIV)


One day, at the end of a political science class, my professor called me to his desk.  And right there, an opportunity I could never have imagined changed my life forever.  I could go to Japan to study in a university on a full scholarship through the Japanese embassy!  The day I turned in my application, a dragonfly or tombo was hanging about my front door.  I knew that day that I was going to get my scholarship!  The two years I spent in Japan were some of the happiest in my life and truly blessed me.   And that provided a valuable lesson to me. Sometimes when God says "No" it is because He has greater plans for us.  Plans we could never imagine. 



There was a time early in my career when I was laid off and couldn't see past my tears and feelings of embarrassment.  I'd considered that company like family and worked until the wee hours of the mornings, invested in its financial success.  But despite my feelings of defeat, what followed was a completely new career that took me around the world and to my beloved France for the very first time! 

God said "No" to many a college boy that I tried to mold into my idea of husband material.  But at the age of 35, after 5.5 years of dating, He (ok, can I say "finally"?) married me to my best friend.  A lad from Ireland that I met in Colorado of all places just one month after we were both transferred there for our jobs! 

God said "No" when I cried out for a baby.  I cried when I couldn't get pregnant.  I cried through miscarriages.  And I cried through a cruel ectopic pregnancy that had to be terminated.  But on the eve of Isla's first birthday and just eleven days from Teagan's third birthday, I can say my babies were worth every tear and moment of waiting.  I didn't become a mom the way I imagined. Instead, God brought me to my knees and back to Him.  To depend on Him and His timing.  And in the process, He taught me how to appreciate every single moment of my motherhood.  Even the sticky, poopy, frazzled, vomit-filled days full of no sleep (all of which I've had in the past 24 hours)...because they are precious. 



Now when I pray over a big request or decision we have, I imagine a stoplight, an idea given to  me by a pastor in a sermon I never forgot.  Red. Yellow. Green. You see, sometimes God's answer is "No" and sometimes it's "Not right now."  Sometimes it's "Go. All the way. Go for it!"  And sometimes?  If we are lucky?  It's something we've never even thought to ask for.  Something "Wonderous" as our Poppie would say.  Something magical. And it feels so right. 

I know there are also more serious decisions, painful decisions and I don't want to dismiss them.  I only intend to offer hope with this post.  Is there something you are praying for today?  It would be my privilege and honor to pray for you and your family.  Please leave a comment below.  Or if you would like more privacy, email me at teaganstravels@yahoo.com

In the meantime, let us say this prayer together:

Dear Heavenly Father, thank you for your love and wisdom. Thank you for seeing a big, brighter and more brilliant plan than we could ever imagine possible. Comfort us in our disappointment. Soften our hearts and have us turn to you with patience and gratitude, assured that you have great plans in store for us.  In Jesus' name we pray.  Amen.

Blessings, Michelle

25 comments:

  1. Beautiful!!! I was 34 when I married my husband, so I can really relate. My kids are treasures because I waited so long for them. My husband and I are now dreaming of owning our own home here, Lord willing, in our current school district. Blessings!

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    1. Thanks for sharing your story, Terri! You always inspire me. I will add your dream to my prayers!

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  2. Another very moving post! I was 32 when I married my husband, and 33, 37 and 40 when I had kids. I am now dreaming of bringing home an orphan. Will you pray for God to give us a green light and to let us experience the wonderful joy that comes from restoring a child's soul. Thanks! :)

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    1. Catherine, what a wonderful dream! I will absolutely be praying for you guys. Big hugs my sweet friend!

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  3. I thank God for this post (I feel like it was written just for me). It has truly comforted me and spoke to my heart in regards to some things that I am going through. God said yellow, and I trust his timing! :)

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    1. Hi Khalilah, I pray God will give you His peace and comfort as you wait for that green light! I will be praying for you. Thank you so much for visiting my blog. I hope you will be back often!

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  4. Thank you for this post I needed to read it and remember that He is in charge.

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    1. I'm so glad, Michelle! Thank you so much for visiting my blog! I hope you'll be back often. Have a blessed Sunday!

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  5. Just hopping over from It's So Very Cheri blog hop and found you. Even though I am at a different place in my life than you I am still praying for..... I also pray for patience and guidance and being able to continue this leg of my journey. Sometimes I don't think I can continue but I remember with God's guidance I can:) So I continue to struggle on. I am now following you and would love you to visit and maybe follow back. I so need all the prayers that are sent my way.

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    1. Thanks so much, Evelyn! I just became a follower on your blog too! Congrats on your new truck and bloggy milestone! I will definitely keep you in my prayers.

      Michelle

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  6. Thank you for re-affirming God's love for me.

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    1. Hi Debra,
      Sometimes I have to remind myself that God took the time to make each and every one of His children unique and special. And He is with us always.

      I hope you have a blessed day and will be back on Teagan's Travels!

      Michelle

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  7. Hi,
    I'm a new follower from Cheri's linky blog hop.
    I'm hopping around today, but I hope to come back and spend more time
    on my next vist.
    I hope you follow me too :)

    God Bless!!

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    1. Hi Renee! I just followed you on your cute blog! Love all your features and can't wait to get to know my way around more! Hope you have an amazing Friday where you are!

      Michelle

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  8. Michelle,
    This is brilliant, wonderful. Thank you for sharing your heart.
    g i n a

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    1. Thanks, Gina! Your little ones are too precious! I loved checking out your blog and so hope you will join my linky party! That red and blue skirt would be perfect for my Stars and Stripes party especially! I also love this week's cute banner you made!

      Have a great weekend!
      Michelle

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  9. Beautiful post. One of my favorites!! Your a brilliant writer. :) Krissy O'Hare

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  10. This is a great post. The stop light analogy is a really good visual to hang onto. I am just so glad God's got the bigger picture in mind, and I'm glad you have the wisdom to see it.

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    1. Thanks Mama Jodi! I'm so loving your blog and am glad you stopped by! We are only a smidge into our collage but having a great time with it!

      Have a wonderful weekend!
      Michelle

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  11. I enjoyed this post and appreciate your open-ness. You will bless so many gals lives with this post. I have been writing our journey (Empty Arms Broken Hearts) and it is always such a blessing to be there for them as they walk that journey.

    Cheri from Its So Very Cheri

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  12. This post was a beautiful reminder that God is with us always. There have been times in my life when I've been in despair over something, and only later can see that God had a better plan all along. I found you on the weekend blog hop and am now a follower. Thank you for the inspiring words.

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  13. Thanks for linking up to the Tuesday To Do Party! Hope you'll come again this week! This month's Pretty Packages party is now up for any of your lovely wrapped gifts!
    http://blackberryvine.blogspot.com/2012/04/pretty-packages-party-14-highlights.html
    Smiles!
    Jami
    www.blackberryvine.blogspot.com

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  14. So true! It's difficult when we get those "no's", but looking back we can really see the Lord's hand in our lives.

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  15. Love this! I recently wrote a post very similar to this! :)

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